Perhaps I am just being sappy - but today I have been awash in gratitude for the opportunity to share the last 14 years married to an amazing man. He may be hundreds of miles away and the chaos of the day reigns on the home schedule - but I am comforted knowing that, even apart, it is a blessing to be part of such a special relationship.
Last night I got out the big wedding album and looked through every page remembering the joy of that day. I found myself looking over and over again at one particular photo - and was caught by how much it really reflects how we started our journey - and where we find ourselves today. It's not the bouquet and garter toss or the cake cutting (we were VERY polite). Rather - it was the picture below - with the two officiants. One a female Presbyterian pastor and one an Irish Catholic priest (complete with brogue). There, at the beginning of our journey, was the perfect example of how our faith, even with its differences, stands at the center of our relationship.
It wasn't always obvious at first. I don't think we really thought about it. We knew what we were getting into after having dated for 6 years. We had gone to church with each other for years, went thru 2 different sets of pre-marriage preparation, filled out twice the paper work, and negotiated the fine line of wedding jargon in order that our union would be seen as valid in both churches. Then we had a really awesome party to celebrate getting through all that!
Now, 14 years and 2 kids later - we continue to participate in two different faith communities, fill out twice the paperwork, and negotiate the fine lines of our differing beliefs. Guess not much has changed!
And maybe that's the point? I've been trying to pinpoint the reasons our marriage has not only survived, but grown and flourished, in a world that seems determined to de-value the institution as passé. It's not just about going to church. I've seen long lasting marriages between people who never go to church, and I've seen divorce between active church members. I could say our situation is the benefit of socio-economic status, luck, determination - or some combination of that. I could say that we've had good examples to follow - of both what to do and what not to do. That probably all plays a part. And it's not like we have not had our share of trouble - we've dealt with economic challenges, health issues, family stress, church controversies and all the other ways life throws a curve ball.
But underneath it all, there has always been a confidence that regardless of what the day brought, our individual faith grew by an exponential factor when we faced the day together - and so did our ability to deal with whatever God decided to send our way.
